Well, here it is Christmas Eve. I have to say that this year it has been weird. It just doesn't seem like tomorrow is Christmas. This is the first year that Nate has kind of understood things. He knows that Santa is going to bring presents. However, we never took him to see Santa. I guess our stand-by is the ward Christmas party, however, we did not go this year. And I just don't want to take my baby out to a mall right now. (call me crazy) So that never happened, and I feel a little bad about that.
I guess part of the problem is that today is starting like any other day. Jesse is at work, and I'm home with the kids. We aren't doing anything special. I'm doing laundry. This afternoon we are going to Jesse's parent's house, but that is all the way after nap time. I need to go to the grocery store this morning. I want Graham to eat well before we go though, but this morning he is especially stuffy, so eating it not so much happening. Another part of the problem is that I'm just so tired. I'm pretty sure that I was awake more than I was asleep last night. It was a particularly rough night. I think that's mostly it. It's hard to get excited for Christmas when you are so tired.
And since this is already such a downer, here's one more thing I'm sad about. Growing up, my mom wrapped all of our presents so that they looked nice (not with bows and stuff, but just so that they were wrapped neatly.) and she used all sorts of different wrapping paper, so that when we came out on Christmas morning, all of the presents were spread out under the tree in all of their splendor. Well. The problem is that Jesse is not a wrapper. (I love you Jesse.) So I do a good job of wrapping his presents and Nate's presents, but he is going to come home tonight at 9:00, and be too tired to wrap presents, so either everything will be wrapped in the bag or box that they came in, or everything will be hastily wrapped in all the same paper. It just isn't as pretty. Is it asking too much to put some effort into it so that I can unwrap pretty presents? i know, it's totally not important. It is just something I kind of feel bad about come present time.
So there you have it. I'm too tired for Christmas this year. I just need to read the Christmas story a bunch more times, and maybe some other inspiring Christmas messages. So we'll see. Sorry this is such a downer, but you get what you pay for.
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